Drown Your Sorrows

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Special Ed

It will forever be known as the "Fun Punt Formation". I mean, who knows if we will ever see it again. The criticism it has received has been extraordinary. From Bob Griese in the booth during the game to every radio and tv commentary regarding the game since. So, I'm not sure if Lloyd will have the stones to run it again, but it would be FUN, wouldn't it?

Michigan jumped out to a 14-0 lead in this game, and all was fine in the Wolverine universe, but Iowa finished the game on a 30-13 run from that point, slowly but surely converting every Michigan miscue into some type of points. Once again however, it came to an end with the offense on the field, and an startingly familar overthrown 4th down ball by John Navarre. Iowa 30, Michigan 27.

Hell Week Continues

Minnesota remains. Consequently, the last time we won a road game was last year at Minnesota. Scary thought isn't it?

Big Ten Opener...Yawn

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Wins and Losses

What's worse, an uninspired team posting a crappy defeat, or an uninspired and undeserved victory? Well, I'll take the victory every time, but the next time we have a game like the one on Saturday, I'll also take drugs. Comtemplating a nap in the first quarter, I saw four turnovers through the slits of my eyes. Somewhere between a good dream and a nightmare, I wasn't sure that I saw the correct score on the scoreboard given our poor performance. Then Steve Breaston caught a punt, and I was sure he was down, so I went back to sleep, but I was rudly awakened by fans cheering for a touchdown. Thank god for the replay on the scoreboard, or I would have missed it.

The defense looked somewhat efficent, but the offense was mostly stagnant...not to mention the ridiculous turnovers. The back-ups did a great job of making the game look good for the Hoosiers, allowing two touchdowns in the last five minutes as the Wolverines went on to victory 31-17.

Who Are These Guys?

Charlie Whitehurst, Clemson; Joel Klatt, Colorado; Kevin Kolb, Houston; Bruce Gradkowski, Toledo; Aaron Rodgers, California; Alex Smith, Utah; Ingle Martin, Florida; Ryan Hart, Rutgers; Tye Gunn, TCU; Kellen Clemens, Orgeon; Brad Smith, Missouri; Chris Leak, Florida; Matt Leinart, USC; Eric Greenberg, Colorado; Cory Randolph, Wake Forest; Jay Cutler, Vandy

Answer:

Freshman and Sophomores in the NCAA with better passing effieciency ratings than John Navarre. They represent 16 of the 61 quarterbacks that are better than Navarre in this category. Only Indiana's Matt LoVecchio, Northwestern's Brett Basanez, and Penn State's Zach Mills are worse in the Big Ten.

Hell Week

At Iowa. At Minnesota. Seven days with 34 hours of land travel. I can't promise solid updates during this period, but I will do my best to keep you posted on the activities of the tailgate.

Navarre Again

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Coming Up Short

OK, listen. I've watched the game now in the friendly confines of my living room. The truth hurts, and I somewhat agree with Tuba. Laying blame is something we all look to do when faced with an unfathomable defeat. Let me tell you where I think it lies...

#1 Gameplan: For the first time in my 10-year, Riverview-biased, Lloyd-loving career, I can tell you this...we we're outcoached in large facets of the game. Perhaps not outcoached completely, as Mike Belotti made some TERRIBLE calls towards the end of the game. But not recognizing earlier that the Ducks were basically in goal-line defense is not excusable. Or was the staff afraid to turn it over to John Navarre and the passing game so early in the game? Do they also beleive what everyone else seems to already know?

Defensively we were on the field for the entire first quarter. And sure, we can blame the offense for putting them right back out there after they made a stop. But the offense didn't allow Oregon to sustain a Michigan-like nine minute drive to start the game.

#2 Heart and Homefield: I made a statement this week that Michigan on most occasions is the more talented team. They just need to find what motivates them to come away with a victory. This is the reason that you don't often see Michigan lose to the same team in consecutive years. This is the reason we stuck it to Notre Dame. This is the reason that they should stick it to Iowa. But a weeks worth of "Michigan tends to lose these west coast road trips" and "Michigan is going to have trouble in Autzen Stadium" and "Oregon is the Ohio State of the Pac-10" must not have been enough. Flat out...the Ducks wanted it more. I mean, these whackos drove a man-sized duck out onto the field in a motorcycle, with all the grace and tradition of a bad Disney movie. Then they systematically bullied the greatest team in college football history into submission. They forced a team loaded with talent to put the game into the hands of its least explosive and talented skill player.

#3 John Navarre: Yeah, it's his fault if you want to pick a player. You will see someday when these young receivers get balls thrown to them in stride. It will be an amazing sight. The passes John threw were not just telegraphed, not just off target, they were also horribly thrown balls. There were 12 ducks on the field on that 4th and 7 play that ended the game. The eleven wearing green and yellow, and the one wearing pigskin that clanked almost sideways off of Braylon Edwards's injured hand.

Regroup?

I'm not sure that the Wolverines can, but I know we can. The tailgate is ON for Saturday, and the theme is....drumroll please... Oktoberfest. So get your mugs ready for some dark beer, sausage, kraut, and cheese. But take some speed, because we're playing Indiana. Let's hope it won't take Johnny Wangler to Anthony Carter to get it done.

Return to Mediocrity

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A Sheep In Wolves Clothing

Notre Dame. The Fighting Irish. The gold helmets, the tradition, the team centered play, and the #1 win percentage in the history of college football. In 1887, the Wolverines stopped off on their way to a game with Chicago and showed a group of Notre Dame students how to play football. 116 years later, we showed them again. Ranking as one of the all-time feel-good games along with the pasting of Penn State in State College in 1997, Anthony Carter's miracle in 1979, and Dreisbach to Hayes in 1995, Michigan completely dismantled the Cowering Irish, 38-0.

A Perry Good Time

Talk about him. Get on the bandwagon. Chris Perry rushed for 133 yards, had 44 yards receiving, and scored 4 total touchdowns. He is the nation's leading rusher and the nation's leading scorer. And now, Chris is rapidly becoming the most talked about Wolverine since Charles Woodson. Whether or not Chris can keep up his pace in the coming weeks remains to be seen, but revel in it now... sorry Maurice, there's a new running back that is the sparkle of the media's eye.

Yellow Uniforms?

No time to rest as Michigan heads west, where success has been non-existant since a 1998 Rose Bowl victory. The Wolverines and UMTailgate.com will head to Eugene for a matchup with with the Oregon Ducks. Luckily, Joey Harrington and Onterrio Smith will be watching on TV.

Vamos Azul!

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Ho Hum...

Breakfast burritos, quesadillas, fajitas, and tons and tons of chips filled the tables for the Mexican Fiesta themed tailgate on Saturday. This 'sandwich' game, in between the opener and Notre Dame, was less crowded but just as intense. The amount of food was certainly astounding, and had it all been eaten, we would have had some classic cases of Mexican-themed Montezuma's revenge.

Again, As Expected

Houston had little to offer, being unable to stop the run, and less able to move the ball than Central. The Wolverine defense took last week's lackluster performance to heart, and shut down Houston in every way, allowing only 3 points and sub 100 yard performances in both rushing and passing. Chris Perry held on to the lead as the nation's leading rusher with 184 yards, bringing his total to 416 for the season, 2 yards more than Anthony Davis of Wisconsin. Michigan is ranked #1 in the nation for total rushing offense as well, with 367 yards-per-game, and #2 in total offense in the country, just behind Boise State. The Wolverines scored 21 points in the 4th quarter, including two rushing touchdowns by Pierre Rembert, and defeated the Cougars 50-3.

...Now the season really starts

College football's version of the preseason ends for the Wolverines next Saturday, when the mystical Fighting Irish come to town. Michigan has a score to settle with the Irish, who narrowly defeated the Wolverines last season 25-23. In addition, the game is slated for a 3:30pm start, which means a 7.5 hour tailgate, so get your rest on Friday night, there's a long day of drinking ahead. The tailgate theme is Grill the Irish, so think burgers, steaks, chicken, or any other type of flesh that would make a vegetarian squeemish. Look for a post by Sister Kristen later this week, as well as the Notre Dame preview. Don't forget to coordinate the menu with Bubba's wife at theme@umtailgate.com.